Just BE - Your Presence Matters

(Baby Nug holding his daddy's finger.)

One of my best inspirations for this blog comes from personal experiences. This is NOT a fireline story. Very few of our leadership moments happen in the line of duty; most happen in our everyday lives. May you find a nugget or two from mine.


On May 22, my nephew and his wife became the parents of a miracle baby. Baby Nug was born prematurely at 27 weeks and 1 lb. 11.8 oz. Nug's momma had developed a condition of severe preeclampsia with HELLP syndrome—a life-threatening pregnancy complication.

Being Nug's great aunt doesn't give me any power or authority. However, great aunts (or anyone) can be leaders in moments of crisis. You see, Baby Nug and his parents live 120 miles from a neonatal intensive care unit and had to be flown by fixed wing to Boise where Auntie Pam lives. Chances were that our little family would make it to Boise before the grandparents/parents would arrive. Somebody should be at the hospital when the little family arrived. Auntie Pam volunteered for the task.

There really wasn't much for me to do. Hospital time tends to run slower than clock time; therefore, grandparents were able to drive from the Magic Valley to Boise before the family arrived. Auntie Pam could have gone home for the night and let the immediate family provide, but she stayed and did what every leader can do—be present.

"Showing up, to me, means being present to what is real, what is actually happening." - Nadia Boltz-Weber, Pastrix

Being present is one of the greatest of all leadership qualities. As a great aunt, I had no authority to make decisions, but I could be there to listen, console, and BE. Just being provided the comfort and care our family needed.

HELLP syndrome requires a delicate balance between keeping the mother alive while getting baby strong enough for birth. Birth is the cure for HELLP syndrome. About a week into our journey, Baby Nug made his quick entrance. During a check, the doctor broke the water to promote a natural birth. Out came the umbilical cord and a tiny hand, necessitating a cessarian section birth. Nobody was ready! The baby would be born within minutes and people were everywhere; someone needed to act. I could be mobile and reassemble Team Nug.

• Daddy was in a state of confusion outside the operating room (his mother and I had stepped out of the room for the check); get him his mother and father. 
• Mommy's mother, father, and sister-in-law were offsite; notify them to get to the hospital ASAP. 
• New auntie was heart-broken she missed the event; listen to niece and provide comfort.

My intent was to be present and to do what I could to provide comfort and love. Leaders can do this regardless of a crisis. Being present takes practice, but is invaluable when needed. A person doesn't have to go looking for leadership; sometimes leadership finds the person. I challenge you to BE:

• Just BE
• Be ready to listen.
• Be ready to love.
• Be ready to act.
• Be ready to hear what others may not.
• Be ready to provide calm during a storm.
• Be ready to step back.

Baby Nug's journey is just beginning. He will be in the hospital for a few months and could use all the thoughts, prayers, and well wishes you can send his way. In the mean time, Auntie Pam will be present and ready to lead as needed.

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Pam McDonald is a writer/editor for BLM Wildland Fire Training and Workforce Development and member of the NWCG Leadership Subcommittee. The expressions are those of the author.