Tuesday, February 14, 2023

Another Confession - I Want to Listen with My Heart

Listen, understand, act tiles

(Listen, Understand, Act" by highersights is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 2.0.)

In my last blog, I shared with you that I am a horrible communicator. As I do my research for the 2023 Wildland Fire Leadership Development Program (WFLDP) campaign on servant leadership, I have more work to do on listening to others. I want to move from being an active listener to an empathic listener.

Stephen Covey discusses five levels (continuum) of listening in Habit 5 - Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood in The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People:

  • Ignoring - not really listening at all
  • Pretending - acting as if listening but not hearing
  • Selective - hearing only certain parts of the conversation
  • Attentive (active and reflective) - paying attention and focusing energy on the words that are being said
  • Empathic - listening with intent to understand; getting inside another person's frame of reference
As I take an in-depth look at Habit #5 and the examples Covey related, I realize my storytelling/analogy-telling self was listening to share my own stories. I thought I was connecting with personal example; but I was focusing on myself and not seeking to understand the other person. Our situations may be completely different. I am not seeking to understand. I was projecting my autobiography onto another.

I want to be better. I can be better.

Wildland Fire Leadership Challenge - Digging a Little Deeper


Pam McDonald is a writer/editor for BLM Wildland Fire Training and Workforce Development and member of the NWCG Leadership Committee. The expressions are those of the author.
2023 WFLDP campaign logo

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